You just know . . . you know!

So last night I got to see a brand new 4 day old sweet baby boy. My friend Michelle had her third boy - Graham. He was so tiny and wrinkly and cute!!! My sister in law Megan just had their second child - a brother to Gwen, and he's just as squishy cute!

So . . . how do you know when you're done having kids??? You just know. I never understood that when people told me. I couldn't fathom having that sure, undeniable knowledge that there wasn't another little one waiting to come to our home. But it's different when I see a newborn now. Just different. I don't have that "next time" feeling. Or a longing. Or wonder. I just know.

So although they are still beautiful and tug at my heart strings - although they are just so darn squishy and tiny and lovey . . . I am calm and peaceful in the knowledge that I will never have another newborn myself. It's not only made me change my perspective on us being a "complete" family . . . but it's also made me focus more on the stages of my older kids. Knowing that I have overflowing blessings from four little people with whom I am lucky enough to experience their childhood. I'm not waiting for another family member - it just feels . . . complete. I love that feeling!

Been Busy . . .

So I have been busy lately. You know, sometimes I just feel like I fall short on so many things - but lately . . . I've gotten a boost - mainly through getting things done!

Last week was a crazy, eventful week - one of those, I was so busy but I couldn't tell you all the things I did kind of week.

Although - I can say that I changed a tail light by myself, made a "Hobbes" stuffed toy without a pattern, and did a LOT of paper counting in the form of inventory at the store. On the day that I finished Hobbes, I felt so darn accomplished. I'll post photos soon - Harrison is going to be Calvin for Halloween - I'll give you the full story on THAT panic-inducing experience later! Oh - and of course there was a lot of illness going around.

Two Sundays ago must have been quite the exposure! Poor little Jack ended up throwing up through the night Monday and into Tuesday . . . come to find out - ALL the kids from nursery were experiencing the same illness at the same time . . . then passed it on to their family members. So it filtered through our family - all except Aidan - (knock on wood!!!)

So I just wanted to let you all know I'm still here . . . we're all healthy at the moment and eating a little too much pre-Halloween candy. Do they make a bag smaller than 10 lbs?????

This guys' funny!

So if you didn't watch the McCain/Obama roast last week - it was hilarious!!! And I think the reason we haven't heard more about it in the media is that by all standards - McCain won this one!

He knows how to deliver a joke and I can't tell you how much I laughed! Obama . . . well . . . not so funny. Dry, yes. Boring, yes. Not funny at all - NOPE!!!!

Oh The Things That You'll Find

Congratulations!

Today is your day.

You're world is the laundry!

Wash, dry, put away!

You have lights in one pile.

You have darks in another.

You have kid piles and dad piles

for baby, for mother.

You're a mom and a wife so you've done this before.

You are able to task laundry, dishes and store.

You launder on auto. Perhaps thrice a week.

Do not begin to act lax, or dyed wax it will leak!

With your head on school projects and toenails to clip,

With even your smarts you are able to slip.

And you may not find any

Of those rocks, clips or trash.

But on a random day of grace

You may encounter some cash.

But it is on those days rare

No scrutiny, beware!

In pockets they hide

so frequently, too

those items that say, 

"what?" "where" "huh?" "who?"

And when things you gather

seem odd and unknown -

It just might decipher

a child's stops coming home.

OH!

THE THINGS THAT YOU'LL FIND!

{Silly little spoof of mine from my favorite: Dr. Seuss' "Oh, The Places You'll Go!"}

Like Mother Like Son

I have a horrible memory - I really can't remember much from my school days or even Jr. High days . . . but once in a while I'll have an experience that will trigger a memory - this was one of those moments.

I remember back when I was about 8 or 9 - I was in my friend, Jodie Cushing's basement - she had the "Grease" record and we'd play our favorite songs over and over while singing to them. Well - fast forward 26 or so years and here's my son, with his little buddy, listening to the "Star Wars" theme and "singing" along - I got caught taping so the entertainment ended, but I wish I could have gotten the more dramatic re-enactments and the more energetic display of their musical experience. It's hilarious to me - that these boys have their own method of "singing along." Check out the goggles and fedora . . . and they both had weapons - 

So back when I was doing my impression of Sandy - and singing to my make-believe Danny, I would NEVER have thought some of the boys in my class were putting on their own music and grooving to it. Just makes me realize that although there are huge differences between the sexes, there are, in fact, some things that are universal - although in application we display them slightly different.

I'm a Soft-y!

Photo by Ronalyn Barut September 19, 2008

So have you ever just told your kids, "Stop touching me!" ? ? ? Well, I have to admit that at times I have had so many little grubby hands touching, poking and smearing at me that yes, I have told my child not to touch me. A couple weeks ago Jack was busy bugging me and I said, "Can you please just not touch me right now." His response melted my heart!!!

"But mommy, you are so soft." 

He then proceeded to stroke my arm - and I enjoyed every second of it!

Happy Birthday, Love!

Photo by Ronalyn Barut 9-19-08

Happy Birthday to my best friend. You're old now - as old as me! And I want you to know how much I love being your wife. I'm still head over heels - and grateful every day that I am the one you want to spend forever with. I've got a list of blessings so long I could never be able to list them - so here are just a few . . . 

*Although it's true that you're a guy . . . in that realm, you are the best communicator I know! I'm so grateful to be able to talk . . . about everything and anything! I've never felt afraid, or that certain topics are off limits - you let me speak my mind (even when it's slightly swayed by emotions) and you always try to decipher my girl-code. Most chicks I know just aren't that lucky!

*You not only let me be me . . . you love me.

*Tenth anniversary ring . . . 'nuff said!

*You're not a big forgiver (in a good way!) . . . that's because you don't let your feelings get to the point where you have to forgive me . . . you don't get mad at me and you never hold a grudge. I wanna be more like that, so you don't see me angry - workin' on it dear!

*You keep the OCD, stress-case, orderly, uptight me to a minimum. Really - where would I be without you???

*You're taking me to Hawaii in a few weeks! {without any little people of our genetic mix!}

*You're a great partner in every aspect of life . . . as parents, as budgeters, as decision makers, as disciplinarians, as entertainment seekers, as dinner eater outers, as mac enjoyers, as interests supporters, as life balancers, as letting each other be and do what we want-ers. You get the idea!

I love you loads - and hope you have a great birthday - request for your favorite better-than-any-you've ever tasted creamy chicken enchiladas granted! I'd suspend my diet for you anytime. (Hmmmmmm I think I just stumbled on a personal a-ha moment!!! Maybe that's why I'm just not back in my smallest jeans!)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Poop relief, Vomit alert!

No poop this time . . . yet.

But I've been up all night almost on the hour - Jack's been throwing up. Poor little man - he's to the point where there's nothing but bile - actually after the first two bouts it was all bile from there. He's wiped out - I'm wiped out - poor Dan, he's wiped out and had to go to work. Vomit is the A#1 thing I hate most about being a mom. Smelling it, cleaning it up . . . you get the point - so I'm off to take care of the little bug - and hope that he doesn't spread the bug he's caught to his brothers and sister - and parents. Ick!

Bull's Eye!!!

Oooooooooooooohhhhhhhhh yeah!!!!

I know it's silly, but I'm as giddy as a kid on Christmas. We now have a Target. I made my second trip there today - and it only "officially" opened yesterday. No - I didn't go on Sunday - but I went on Thursday - the day after the "unofficial" opening. And I have to say that I felt for the brief time I was in there that I was in the lower 48. {A term we use to describe the 48 states that are down there - all mushed together in the same land mass . . . Alaska and Hawaii are not part of that 48 - thus the term} ANYWAY - I felt normal. That's not to say that I don't feel normal up here. Hmmmmm - how else can I put this? I no longer felt deprived - maybe that's it. For as long as we've been up here in the Last Frontier {yet another term . . . hey, what can I say, we have a long winter to huddle inside and think up new and interesting terms to describe things! Haven't you heard how many words the Alaska Natives have for snow??? Look that one up!} ANYWAY - Since living up here in the last state admitted into the United States of America, I've felt like we lack quite a bit of commerce. But in these last 7 years we've managed to get an increasing amount of national chain stores. We now have a couple Bed, Bath & Beyond's, a Best Buy, upgraded Michael's and JoAnn stores, and more. So now that we have a Target - I just can't complain. This is the store I always wanted. When any other store was announced to come in, we'd say, "Yeah, but I wish it were a Target." "Oh, I wish Target would come up here." Target Target Target. So now our wishes have been granted. We are no longer deprived. Although because of crazy Union issues - they couldn't make it a Super Target - now that would be heaven! Oh - by the way, another Target is being built even closer than the current one that's only about 20 miles away! 

Darse Vader

So as I'm dressing Jack the other day I catch him picking his nose again.

"Jack, please don't pick your nose." 

"But mommy, Darse Vader does it sometimes, too!"

Will this kid ever stop picking his nose? Or at least stop passing the blame to others? When will he run out of justifiable allies? Must say that my 3 year old has no holes in his cognitive development! If he did . . . he'd probably pick that too!

Not just a mere dusting!

Alright! So we were hit a bit more with snow. I think I really am in denial - except that yesterday morning - after opening the blinds and waiting for the shock to subside, I went out and built a snowman with Jack. Dan had been shoveling the driveway and Jack kept running out in his thermal jammies without shoes - Dan took pity on him and helped him get on boots - then went out and played for a minute. They started rolling a big snow ball - and Dan had to leave for work. Consequently, I had to deal with a grumpy child with no other objective than to get back out in the snow. So we bundled up. Poor little Aidan. He couldn't sit in all that snow gear, and he couldn't walk in all that snow gear and the large boots that fit over his feety-jammies. So he ended up laying in the snow most of the time - until he figured out how to take off his boots - then he struggled to a stand and soaked his feety-jammies. Fun morning - but we left the snowman sans accessories until the older kids came home and they added a few meager branches. Days like this shock and please my husband. What with me getting outside in the snow and allowing the boys to just run free. What can I say? Keeping the marriage alive with a little shock and awe sometimes! No - really I do enjoy doing it. It's just the getting ready, and the getting undone that has me less than thrilled. 

Unfortunately the snow man is no longer standing. I guess Harrison mis-interpreted Jack's desires when he told Harrison he wanted to break down the snow man. Apparently, he didn't really want to break down the snow man. Hey, with a three year old, there's a lot of mis-interpretation!!!

Ghost Town

Great movie! Dan and I enjoyed a date this past Friday and really liked this movie. Lots of laughs! We highly recommend it!

We were dusted!

Oh man, am I not happy! I was hoping just hoping that we'd be spared  an early winter - we had a LONG winter that rolled into a non-existent summer and now we're back to winter again. 

On the plus side, at least the poop will be easier to detect!

"But Pirates do it too Mommy!"

Yesterday Jack started putting on my knee high boots :

Me (while I'm helping him zip them up in the back): "Jack, you look like a pirate!"

Jack (while picking his nose): "AAAAaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrggggg Matey!"

Me: "Jack, don't pick your nose, that's icky!"

Jack: "But pirates do it too mommy!"

Eme's Room Part II

A couple people have asked me about the canvas in Emery's room - so I thought I'd post a picture of it. The photo is on magnets so we can change it out when there's another photo that works with it as she grows up. But I dunno - I love this photo, it'll be hard to find a replacement.

Epiphanies: I'm on a roll today

* Things aren't usually as hard as we think.

I've been sick for a while . . . so getting back into the routine of exercising and making my bed and getting ready for the day just seemed daunting. But today I got up - and despite being extra tired, I just DID IT all. And you know, after I did . . . I felt better and realized it's just not as hard as we make it out to be.

* I can keep the baby out of the kitchen!

Yeah - what? you say??? What's the big ah ha moment w/ that? This is a silly one, but still very monumental to me. Well, after the little munch-kin mastered the stairs we didn't see a real big need for the safety gate, but after he got into our huge interactive pantry for the FIFTH time today (shaking a damaged oatmeal container all over the living room and dragging the huge tub of olive oil through the front room), I decided enough is enough! I put up the gate and blocked the door that would lead to the kitchen from the Front Room via the Dining Room with his own lock-into-place highchair! Now not only will I avoid finding dented bean cans in the bathroom, but every time I hear silence I won't have to assume my little love bug is into the dish soap under the sink - in an un-kid-proof-able cupboard.

* While reading a little book during my treadmill re-acquaintance session this morning, I was really struck by a couple things. It's called, "When Your Prayers Seem Unanswered" by S. Michael Wilcox. It's a quick read, but it made me look deep into myself and my prayers. I've been feeling disappointed in myself lately. I've told Dan I'm not the strong person I feel like I used to be. I'm not happy with myself. I'm not feeling spiritually rich lately. It was a very nice reassuring book about how the Lord answers prayers - and that EVERY prayer will be answered. He IS watching over us and he IS going to answer. It just gave me a little perspective on it all. The epiphany was striking when he was talking about the parable of the vineyard. There are those vines which are planted in good soil, and in not so good soil, and in bad soil. The vines were all nourished - the ones in bad soil brought forth good fruit and the ones in not so great soil brought forth good fruit but not all those in the good soil did what everyone would expect they'd do - they didn't all bring forth fruit and some of the fruit the did produce was bad. 

I've been planted my whole life in great, fabulous, rich soil. I've been blessed with a family growing up that through all tough times and strain, has come together and never broken. I was taught Christlike principles and loved and taken care of. After getting married, my soil has been nothing but rich. I have a loving, wonderful, forgiving, trustworthy husband who has done everything to help nourish me and our family. But lately, I've not been producing favorable fruit. It's not that I've been growing the wild, not so good fruit - but I've not been growing anything terribly desirable. So I've decided I need to stop worrying about my soil and my nourishment - Soil obviously doesn't matter - fruit can be grown anywhere! Nourishment is available everywhere. We have a loving, all-knowing Father who will nourish us with what we need, when we need it, even if we don't know we need it. So - the only variable is obviously the vine . . . are we going to produce fruit? and what kind of fruit are we going to produce? It's been a good day so far!

~ So tomorrow, the over 13 million members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints have the opportunity to watch or listen to the leaders of our worldwide church. It's one of the things I absolutely love the most about the church. We have ONE group of leaders, ONE prophet/president of the church who leads us - no matter where we are in the world. And twice a year, we hear from the leaders. Both men and women. And I'm very much looking forward to this weekend. There are sessions on Saturday and Sunday . . . check here if you're interested in hearing these amazing, uplifting, and inspiring people. And you will probably learn a little bit more about your Mormon friends if you do. 

It'll be some of that nourishment I was talking about. Good timing for me and my epiphanies. Well - I guess not the keeping my baby out of the kitchen, that's irrelevant. Maybe it's not: Love the baby, not the actions, right?

What is the MOST strange, unpredictable, unbelievable, unheard of thing you can think of???

For the first time in my life, I got a swim suit that I actually like! WHAT? Oh - I know . . . you can hardly believe it as well! Just NOT something that happens everyday - or ever!

Found it on Diviine ModesTee - you can "design your perfect suit!" and while doing so - you can see the pieces. I got it in the mail the other day and LOVED it. I am not dreading Hawaii anymore - although between now and then, I still need to drop 5 lbs - It's not a MIRACLE suit for heaven's sake, but never in my life have I had any feeling other than pure sick to my stomach about how a suit looks on me. This time - not so sick to my stomach! Now that's a fabulous day I think! The one I got is shown above.

"I Quit!"

Oh my little Jack . . . 

a week or so ago, like I mentioned, we got our family photos taken . . . and true to form, Jack was a bit uncooperative. But for some time we could reign him in with promises of Skittles or Starbursts, or asking him to tell stories. However, at one point, he turns his back to us and says, "I quit!" and starts to storm off into the woods. I think it was just to see our reaction, cuz he didn't go far. I can't wait to see those cute photos - hope there's a good one of the little rebel!